Your Partner Cheated: Now What?

There has been an explosion of infidelity of late spurred on by internet social media, abundance of dating apps, and the Grass Is Greener Syndrome.

Nowadays, people are always looking to trade up. Believing that they are better than their partners. When the truth is you are just being lied to by an increasingly selfish and narcissistic society that preaches excess. When the truth is no one is better than anyone else.

Perhaps their physical beauty is more pronounced. But character and other factors lead to lasting relationships rather than superficial hookups. Infidelity has a lot more to do with shallow superficial traits, i.e., money, sex, and status. And much less to do with lasting qualities of morals, intelligence, kindness, caring, and love.

As such, the rampant infidelity is a mind virus perpetrated by selfishness and nothing else. Most of today’s youth have not been taught the value of actual love, caring, or fidelity.

As such, this behavior has been rampant in today’s society and has been encouraged by a government hell bent on destroying the nuclear family as the as it is the bedrock of a stable society.

Further, in as much as the world governments have embarked on a campaign to depopulate the planet, the nuclear family is a major stumbling block in that it is the cornerstone in the continued re-population of the world.

All this being said, let’s address what to do when your partner has cheated on you. First, you must understand that whatever the reason is, it is generally a self-centered act.

There are rare cases in which the cheating partner approached you with their concerns, and you ignored their needs and refused to address them. In this case, then cheating is an attempt to receive what you refused to give.

However, generally what happens is a opportunity presents itself such as someone flirts and shows sexual interest or your partner sees an opportunity for gain whether it’s status, power, financially or sexually and just chooses to take it.

Usually justifying their actions as warranted to correct a slight perceived or imagined by their partner. The most common is a lack of sex.

Which they fulfill with the partners best friend or their boss or other person of authority in your partners life. Or even some taboo action like multiple partners simultaneously or perhaps some other fetish you refuse to indulge them.

You find out about the infidelity, whether via a text message, their actions or their lover confronting you. Now, what? The majority of people react in several ways. They either withdraw entirely, severing all ties monetarily, emotionally, and physically.

Or the second way, which is the nuclear option of scorched earth. In which you go on a revenge trip to destroy your partner and their lover completely. This usually happens due to your ego being damaged. And, a need to restore your sense of self.

Which is correct? The answer is neither. Though you are hurt, you must understand that the issue has zero to do with you. In truth, it has to do with a weakness and an inability of your partner to act like a responsible adult.

As such, neither of the aforementioned options adequately address the underlying issue. That being the character flaws in your partner and in doing either simply highlight an inherent weakness in your own character. As such, you must rationally calmly assess the situation and take a measured response to their failures.

What response did you ask? Well, you must understand the situation. Are they actively trying to hurt you? Do their actions represent an active attempt to directly threaten your property, financial well being or you physical well-being?

If none of these things are true. Then, access what they were trying to achieve by their actions. If they did try to harm you in any way, then of course, take any and all actions necessary to counter such harm.

However, if your partners actions were simply self-centered and motivated to counter some personal slight, you need to ask yourself one question. Am I better off with this person in my life? If the answer is yes, then you need to confront them and attempt to address this betrayal. And find some way to rebuild trust.

Such a rebuilding of trust could be to cut or control access to social media, perhaps tracking programs on cell phones, and agreed to monitoring of devices as well as monitoring of daily actions.

It could also be a renewal of that relationship, perhaps dates, getaways, and of course intimate encounters. No relationship can survive a complete lack of intimacy.

The other alternative is an equitable split and separation. If the truth is the partners liaison was facilitated by a need for something they no longer could get from the relationship, then separation is the only answer in such an event.

Conclusion: Freedom is what should always be maintained rather than disrespect and illicit actions. Rather than betrayal, people should maintain friendship as a basis for all relationships.

Rather than lies and hardships caused by such a breach of trust as occurs due to infidelity. People should simply be honest and part friends maintaining a relationship rather than hurting others for no reason.

However, self-centeredness is wanting to have your cake and eat it, too. And the truth is unless your partner agreed to an open relationship. Infidelity simply destroys not only intimate relationships as well as friendships.

The answer to infidelity is to communicate beforehand. And if a concensus can’t be reached amicably then to part as friends rather than to create animosity that once created can last a lifetime and have a much more far reaching consequence than just the two in the relationship.

Including parent, families, children , friends, and even those at their work and all their families as well. Infidelity is a mind virus that can destroy a society left unchecked. As such, the real answer is communication and real caring for others. As well as respect. If you truly love your partner, grant them freedom and consideration rather than lies and pain.